In short
- Almost all doulas offer a free introductory chat, with no obligation.
- Speak to two or three before you decide. You'll be surprised how different they feel.
- Trust your gut. Feeling comfortable matters more than anything else.
You'll be sharing one of the biggest moments of your life with this person, so you need to feel completely comfortable with them.
Your first chat might be a phone call, a video call or a cup of tea at your kitchen table. There's no hard sell. Good doulas want the fit to be right just as much as you do. Here are five questions to take with you.
1What training have you done?
Doulas are not regulated by law, so anyone can use the title. That makes your own checks more important. A trained doula will be glad to tell you about their preparation. Listen for
- a recognised training course
- membership of a doula organisation, such as Doula UK
- public liability insurance
- a recent DBS check, especially for postnatal doulas who will be alone in your home with your baby
2What exactly is included in your package?
Packages vary a lot, so don't assume. Ask how many visits you'll get before and after the birth, when the on-call period starts and finishes, and whether you can message them between visits. It's just as useful to ask what isn't included.
3What happens if you're ill or at another birth when I go into labour?
Babies don't follow a timetable. Established doulas have a trusted backup and will explain how it works. Ask if you can meet the backup before your due date.
4How do you work alongside NHS staff?
A good doula works well with your midwives and respects their clinical role. You could also ask if they've supported births at your hospital or birth centre before.
5What are your fees, and what happens if I change my mind?
Ask about the deposit, payment plans and what happens if either of you cancels. A professional doula will give you a written contract that covers all of this. Read it properly before you pay anything. If there's no contract, ask for one. See typical doula prices.
Listen to your gut
After each conversation, ask yourself some simple questions. Did I feel listened to? Could I be completely honest with this person? Would I be glad to see their face on the hardest day? If the answer is yes, you've probably found your match. If something feels off, keep looking. The right person is worth the wait.
Be cautious if a doula
- offers medical advice
- is vague about training, insurance or experience
- pressures you to book quickly or pay in full up front
- has no written contract
- talks negatively about the NHS or discourages you from going to NHS appointments
None of these on their own proves anything is wrong. But each is a reason to slow down and ask more questions.
Every doula on BumpBuddy is checked before they appear. We look for recognised training and insurance. You should still ask your own questions, but you're starting from a safer place.
Who this guide isn't for. If you're looking for medical advice about your pregnancy, speak to your midwife or GP. This guide is about choosing support, not about clinical decisions.